truth

its weird cos I’m not sad which is new

I’m just living my life and feeling normal feelings

conclusion: life fucking sucks and everyone hates you

but you hate everyone too so its kind of fair

--

but u were meant to come into my life and change me

u were supposed to be weird and actually not like the ‘other guys’ and u were supposed to rip me open

and make me more truthful and open 

instead of lying

and i was supposed to read bell hooks at the same time and learn to stop pretending and lying

and i was supposed to go to that discussion group on intimacy and feel fucked up about it after

no way is this all just a coincidence

the universe is teaching me truth and honesty and i accept it am accepting it

i can see that now

i am growing

even if I’m not trying and only feel the growing pains

even if we have the same politix n beliefs

so do a lot of people

I’m not throwing up and thats amazing!

I’m proud of myself and I love you

I’m becoming the person i wanted to be

I’m at CSM

I’m 18 and alive

I’m an adult and my mental illness is behind me for now and thats good enough for me

i’m queer and SO ok