Thursday 22 June 2017

under a big tree



all the cigarettes we smoked blew away
i still remember them
the paths we made through our neighbourhoods on the phone to each other
i don't know how to get over you so i sit in memory and look for answers i need in hindsight
i crawl under remembering and it pushes against my body
that's all i can do

i'm choking in my sleep
i'm dancing with my tears
i don't have a shadow anymore
and i can't ask you what you're thinking

u said we were in control , we could choose everything
maybe i try too hard to understand
days simmer and we ran out of time like i feared
you walked away and i'm trying to run

our spaces get reduced to places
you can't find the place for us to fall back into and i want to ask where it went but the feeling comes before the words and the question disappears back into my body

i look up at the trees instead now
i wish i could stay under a tree forever with the branches and leaves above and around me , protecting me
loss is in my lineage. it just feels harder this time



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